Pregnancy After Loss
Deciding to try for another pregnancy can be very difficult. Parents often have a great deal of fear and anxiety as they worry that they may have trouble conceiving, that they may have another loss, or that people will forget about their babies that died. It means juggling feelings of sadness and grief for the babies that have died and anticipation and joy for the babies that are yet to be born.
Parents may wonder if other people will think that a new pregnancy means they are “over” their grief or are replacing the babies that died. And, many parents worry that people, including themselves, will forget about the babies that never came home.
Pregnancy After Loss Awareness DayOn February 27, 2019, Georgia Governor Brian Kemp declared March 20 (the first day of spring each year) as Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Day. March 20, 2019 will be the first time this day is proclaimed as such in the state of Georgia. |
Many parents who have experienced a loss describe a pregnancy after a loss as a loss of innocence. They don’t feel as carefree and safe as they did with other pregnancies. They are now aware of the variety of problems that can occur, dread appointments with doctors or ultrasounds, and hesitate to bond with the new pregnancy and new baby. They no longer feel that pregnancy is a simple, natural state. It has evolved into a time of medical tests, nervousness, and apprehension. The days of dreaming about bringing home a healthy baby are gone, replaced by nightmares that something will go wrong.
The rainbow package with the onesie, hat, blanket, book and more was such a special gift for my husband and I. The journey of pregnancy after loss can feel so isolating and filled with anxiety. This package gave us hope and helped us feel SO comforted and supported by the amazing community of NSH PALS. There aren't enough words to thank you and the program for how you've helped us, and so many other women and families, heal and find hope again through simple gestures like the care package. |
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You may be wondering how someone decides that they are ready to embark on this emotional and physical journey. For most, the physical healing is much faster than the emotional. Your obstetrician or midwife may have given you the green light to try, but your heart may not be ready. You can’t forget what you have experienced in the past. You can’t make yourself ignore the stories you have heard from other parents who have had similar experiences. You can’t force yourself to feel ready when you are not.
Some parents have shared that they knew they were ready to try again when the desire for a baby outweighed the fear. It wasn’t like a switch had been flipped and they woke up knowing they were ready. It was a process that included recognizing how difficult this decision is, making sure to have the support of an obstetrician or midwife as well as your partner, and knowing where you will find strength and support if/when it is needed during the next pregnancy.
Some parents have shared that they knew they were ready to try again when the desire for a baby outweighed the fear. It wasn’t like a switch had been flipped and they woke up knowing they were ready. It was a process that included recognizing how difficult this decision is, making sure to have the support of an obstetrician or midwife as well as your partner, and knowing where you will find strength and support if/when it is needed during the next pregnancy.
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Rainbow P.A.L.S (Pregnancy after Loss Support) is our social support group open to anyone who is considering or experiencing a subsequent pregnancy after loss. Meetings are usually held in a social setting. Past gatherings have been dinner at local restaurants, picnics and group art sessions. The mission of this support group is to celebrate the joys of pregnancy, while supporting one another navigate through the anxiety and fear that surrounds pregnancy after loss. Meetings have included dinners at local restaurants, picnic in the park, and painting with Truth Be Told Art. You can begin your involvement by clicking on the "Join Rainbow P.A.L.S." button included below. This group is open to the community, and free of charge.
It's been a year since my loss. A year since my sweet little baby, and the sibling of my rainbow baby girl, went to Heaven. When I had my loss I knew no one who had lost a baby. It was hard to talk about it with anyone because not only would they act uncomfortable but because they also didn't have any idea what I was going through. After speaking with my doctor who delivers at Northside about my depression, he mentioned this group - and I'm so glad he did. The women in this group, I'm sad to say, understand the loss and pain of what I was going through. And it helped me. It helped during my pregnancy with my rainbow and all the days I was petrified of losing her. It's such an important group for those of us who have experienced this kind of loss - a loss no one else can ever truly understand. |
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